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Abridged Episode 8Edit
Cast (in order of appearance): Jaden Yuki, Syrus Truesdale, Professor Banner, Chumley, Chumley's Father, Chancellor Sheppard, Narrator
Running time: 5:57
Episode Title: Father Drunk-A-Ton
(intro: Outside lying on the tree)
Jaden: man, it feels so relaxing to skip class. It's nothing like I need to learn anything, I win all duels anyway.
Syrus: HEEEEEEeeey, Jaden!!!
Jaden: Oh, God! What do you want?!
Syrus: *huff* *huff* Jaden, you got to hear this; Chumley's dad is here and he said he wants him to take him away from Duel Academy.
Jaden: Um... Question? Why should we care?
Syrus: cause he's our friend.
Syrus: Cause he own enough to buy a couple of jugs.
Syrus: Cause one day, he going to join Industrial Illusion, to give you a card to help you win a duel.
Syrus: Cause I'm kicking your ass if you don't!
Jaden: Good point, Syrus! Come on let's go save Chumley!
(Title Sequence, Jindou's "Rising Weather Hallelujah" plays)
Narrator: Meanwhile. In the... *sigh* You know what, I'm sick of this. it's a toolshed, we get it. I'm outta here, I'm not doing this anymore. I'm going back to my wife and kids. I'm going home!
(Walks away and slams a door)
Jaden: Alright, guys. Back away, main characters coming through.
Father: Ha! Ha! Ha!
Jaden: Wow, eavesdropping is cool.
Syrus: Yeah, it's almost is fun stealing mail.
Jaden: Just chillin, homie.
Syrus: Jaden, stop talking like that.
Jaden: But I-
Jaden: But I-
Jaden: But I-
Jaden: But I... I just-
Syrus: Hey, Jaden.
Syrus: Shut up!
Father: So to summarize I want my son to come back to the family business with his father.
Banner: I see, and why would this be?
Father: We'll talk about that later. Say, are you a drinker?
Banner: Um... only um-
Father: Have you play, Nuts on the Table?
Banner: Um... I don't think-
Father: Then, we're gonna have fun tonight!
Jaden: Hey Chumley, are you okay? I heard tha- whoa! what's going on? why are you packing?
Chumley: *gruntly winning*
Jaden: Oh, don't tell me you're actually cry- Oh my God, you girl! Why don't look the other way? Maybe we should take this up with the Chancellor.
Caption: after 25 minutes of pointless bickering...
Syrus: After 25 minutes of pointless bickering!
Jaden: And that's why Chumley can't leave. His character hasn't been developed enough for us to give us a crap about him!
Father: Well, I haven't heard him complain once. Isn't that right Chumley?
Father: You see.
Jaden: Come on Chancellor, that's no fair!
Sheppard: I'm sorry Jaden, but unless Chumley says "No", there's nothing we can do.
Jaden: Well, what if... um... what's that, Chumley? You wanna duel your dad, and if you win you stay?
Syrus: Jaden, I can't believe you just set that up.
Jaden: Oh, come on. Chumley will do just fine.
Banner: Oh, I wouldn't know about that.
Jaden: Reaction Shot!
Banner: Chumley's father has been the State Champion, three years in the row.
Jaden: Oh... HA! HA! HA! HA! Ah, dude I'm so sorry I have totally screwed you over, but good luck anyway.
Caption: Later that night...
Syrus: Later that night in... Jaden, Why am I doing this again?
Jaden: Because the guy freakin' walking on us, alright.
Banner: So I told my mother... I'm going out... I'm 43 I said... too old be living with you... and I left.
Father: Christ! You only had one drink. Anyway, Nuts on the Table!
Banner: Okay, so I put my nuts on the table, now what happens?
Father: Now I do this!
(Slammed Banner's nuts on the table)
Banner: Oh, My sweet mother of netherith!
Father: AH! You pasted out you gotta take a drink! Ba... Banner? Oh, I'm going out for a drink.
Jaden: King me!
Syrus: Jaden, We're playing Yahtzee.
Jaden: Oh okay, well I wanna buy Mayfair.
Syrus: What the hell are you talking about?
Jaden: Gold Fish!
Syrus: Did you get a caution while no one's looking?! By the way, Chumley could you stop laying cards around the toolshed?
Jaden: Yeah, if you can clean your plate up, you could clean up this room, you messy bastard!
Father: Wow, Banner. I'm surprised you're still standing after last night.
Banner: ~Yes, well...~ *Ahem* Yes, well I know never told to get drunk with you ever again.
Father: Funny? I recall Chumley's mom once saying that, HA! HA! HA!
Banner: Let the duel, begin!
Father: Chumley, you're such a disappointment. I still can't believe you've come to my Lloyd's. Your mother got rest her soul, died shortly after giving birth to your fat-ass. What would she think she saw you now? A failed fat duelist with the obsession of grilled cheese sandwiches, you're no son of mine!
Chumley: Screw you, Dad!
Jaden: WHAT THE-!!!
(cues massive explosions hearing the word "f*ck")
Jaden: Syrus, did you see that? Did you see that Chumley talked? Did you see that? Did yeah? Did yeah? Did yeah?
Syrus: Uh... Hi?
Jaden: Is it uncomfortable that I'm this closed to you?
Syrus: Jaden, get the hell away from me!
Jaden: What if I kiss you?
(Syrus Punched Jaden)
Jaden: Ugh! okay cross the line. Got it.
Chumley: Dad, What you don't realize is I made so many good friends here, who will always back me up and help me when I'm down.
(Jaden and Syrus are laughing at Chumley's voice)
Syrus: ...his voice was so stupid.
Father: Wow, You know Chumley. After seeing your friends support you and imitate favorite Internet References. I now see, You are a true duelist and a great man. I acknowledge you as my son.
Chumley: Does that mean you let me win?
(Chumley's Father was laughing at him)
Jaden: Why do all duels end up with an explosion, Syrus?
Syrus: Why do you insist on getting so close to me!
(Punches Jaden again)
Jaden: Ugh! My pancreas!
Syrus: Take that, you freakin' loony!
(Syrus saying is conclusion speech)
Syrus: And so, after incredibly pointless duel, Chumley's Dad got wasted completely forgot why he came Duel Academy in the first place and left. Leaving with Chumley with nothing but a bill to all the while in order, and what happened to me and my friend? Well...
Jaden: Syrus, what the hell are you doing?
Syrus: I'm monologing.
Jaden: Why are you monologing?
Syrus: F**ck you, that's why!
Caption Ending: We like to refer to this as 'Jaden Ownage' Episode. Remember, never play 'Nuts on the table'. Professor Banner required 17 stitches. Syrus Has filed for a restraining order. His court case is in October.
Jaden: Thanks for the drinks Professor Banner, you're awesome.
Banner: It is a pleasure, Jaden.
Jaden: Hey, do you know any drinking games?
Banner: hmmm? Have you ever heard of Nuts on the Table?
Jaden: Uh... I don't think so.
Banner: Oooo, then this is going to be a lot of fun.